Having participated in the D-Blog Week that ended last Sunday, I definitely noticed a theme: guilt. Many, if not most diabetes bloggers brought up guilt at one time or another during the week. This made me really think about diabetes and guilt.
First, I tried to figure out where this guilt comes from. It seems to me that it has to come from someone other than the one with diabetes. Guilt is something that is caused by judgment from another person. We may superimpose that judgment on ourselves, but it has to originate somewhere outside of us. Did someone make us feel bad for eating something or for having a certain blood glucose level? Did someone threaten us with having to take insulin “if we don’t get our act together?” or with complications, or with our unborn fetus having problems?
I then thought about whether I experience this phenomenon. I am happy to report that I do not. I did at one time, however. I am not exactly sure when I let go of the “diabetes guilt,” but I can say with confidence that when I see a high number on my meter I don’t feel guilty. I truly use it as information to make a decision. And if I decide to eat something that will inevitably raise my blood glucose – that’s my choice and I know how to deal with it.
It’s important to really know ourselves when we live with a chronic condition. We need to know how we handle different situations and we need to understand where our responses originate. Through this knowledge we can make changes or adjustments in how we deal with numbers, and the rest of life with diabetes.
Finally, our attitude is critical. With a positive attitude we can ward off guilt. A positive attitude doesn’t have to come off as fake or phony. It can be a practical approach: treating numbers as numbers (not good or bad) and making choices in every aspect of diabetes management. Guilt can’t make anything better and it can’t change anything, but it certainly can drag us down. For me, it’s much more productive and fun to be in charge and to be positive.